Monday, January 01, 2007

Changes are afoot.

The New Year, time for change and a fresh start. Just to be a right royal pain to any of you that have a link to my site on the page, I have created a brand new blog. I was just going to overhaul this one but I wanted to keep all my pregnancy stats and things like that and in my new design there wasn't a place for it so the easier alternative was just to make a new one.



This is Me on Christmas Day. I now weigh 94.3kg again and am totally ready to shift some serious weight.

My new blog is: www.slimmingmummy.blogspot.com

please come along and join me for the rest of my journey.
Posted by Kim :: 3:18 PM :: 1 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Thursday, December 28, 2006

The end... and the beginning

I started this entry last night but with the madness in my house it just got too late and I had to save it and finish it tonight, so here goes.

Well it is finally the end of Christmas and almost the end of the year.

Christmas was very stressful in our household. Running around getting all the stuff ready for our first ever beach BBQ breakfast, leaving an hour late, getting there and only one table left right on the far side of the reserve, the wind that kept blowing the BBQ out and ending up taking an hour to cook bacon and eggs, going to feed Caitlyn and discovering that I had packed the bottles of boiled water and formula but forgetting to put teats on the bottles so Pete having to drive to the closest local deli to buy some, the temp rising to 34 and Bethany getting sunburnt.



Then on getting home, I discovered that although we had been under a shelter and Caitlyn undercover in her pram, she had gotten sunburnt too. That night she was bright red and I think in pain so at 9pm we gave her a lukewarm bath and that seemed to help a lot! I was so tired after the long day and felt so bad at her painful cries that I broke into tears and kept calling myself a terrible mother for letting both my poor girls burnt (Bethany had suncream on so there wasn't really a lot I could do there but still continued to blame myself). Come Boxing Day Caitlyn was just a little pink and by yesterday you couldn't even tell. Bethany's finally stopped hurting today. Next year, I think we may just stay home!

My poor sunburnt little bubby


And her poor sunburnt big sister (in her new high heels to match her pretty dress)


And now on to the beginning. The beginning of the new year and the beginning of a new me (again). Lately I have really had the urge to start the weightloss journey again. This has been strengthened over the last few days while out shopping to get new summer clothes and having to get size 18 (which I swore I would never wear again). However I have been a good girl and waited the 6 weeks that you are advised to after giving birth (that and the fact I am still feeling pretty drained and exhausted at times). My 6 weeks runs out on Sunday, which is also New Year's Eve, meaning I am right to start on New Year's Day, which is my New Year's resolution (is that spooky timing or what? Just shows it was meant to be!)

So come Jan 1 I will weighin, take measurements and start a fresh. Might even give this old blog a face lift (as quite a few of us seem to be lately) I will only start off slowly and gradually try to get back to where I was. I need to clean out the fridge and stock up on good stuff. Thankfully all the cakes and chippies from Christmas are now all gone.

I know that there are going to be days when I am just too tired to get some exercise and I am not going to beat myself up about it. As long as I get back to healthy eating and a little exercise every week to start, by the time Caitlyn starts to settle down with her sleeping and such, I should be in a position to build myself up.

So there you have it. The wind of change are blowing in and my blog is once again about to change. Trust me, there will be days when all I talk about is my girls, but hey, my whole world revolves around them and without them I am incomplete. And by the end of this journey they will have a happier, healthier mummy and that can only be a good thing.

If I don't update again before New Years Day, I wish all of you the best for New Years. Don't do anything I wouldn't and make sure its a safe one.

Posted by Kim :: 10:10 PM :: 2 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Thursday, December 21, 2006

4 Sleeps to go

Hi there,

Sorry for the lack of updates, just been busy, busy, busy.

Am pleased to say that all presents have now been bought. The tree is totally decorated, including lights. There are Chrissy lights in my front lounge window (I usually do the whole front of the house) and most of the food is bought.

Geez, am I pooped.

Am going through a stage with Caitlyn where she doesn't want to settle down in the late afternoon and it drags on for hours. Bethany was the same. It happens in quite a lot of babies but is supposed to stop at 12 weeks so I have about 7 1/2 weeks to go.

It is amazing to think she is now a month old. The first 2 weeks of stress seem so long ago but just like yesterday, if you know what I mean. Now, if we can just teach her to settle and sleep in her bassinette in the afternoons, it might just let me feel half normal LOL. But it just awesome to look at her now. She is smiling, cooing, laughing(with no sound, just big gummy grin) and just so alert.

Here is a pic taken of her just tonight.



And here's one taken last Sunday morning (Caitlyn is actually smiling!)



And finally, here's one of my girls taken yesterday in front of our Christmas tree. Bethany is wearing her new dress that was sent all the way from Tasmania by her Poppy for Christmas (we let her open that one when it got here Tuesday)



So now I will sign off for tonight as it is 9.15pm and Caitlyn is actually asleep and due for a feed around 11ish so I may get an hour and a half sleep before then. I will try and update again before Christmas but if I don't, I wish all of you out there in blogland the happiest of Christmases. Be merry and enjoy the time you spend with whomever you spend it with. Thank you all for bearing with me this year, eventhough my blog hasn't really been weight related (although that is due to change come Jan 1st, trust me, I am already looking in the mirror and not likeing what I am seeing and the scales have jumped 2kg in the last week!). I wish you all the love and happiness that you all deserve.

Luv yas all!!!!!!!

Posted by Kim :: 7:00 PM :: 3 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Almost ready

Well I am almost ready for Christmas. Just have Pete's presents to go. It has been a bit hard on Bethany so far this week as I have been at the shops every morning and she is getting very bored with the whole thing. Pete went back to work on Monday so have been trying to get all the shopping done with the 3 of us and my mum and now it is just one present to go.

I am thinking about getting mum to come around either tomorrow arvo or Friday and just after Caitlyn has a feed and goes to sleep, get her to look after her and me and Bethany go somewhere just the 2 of us, like to the library, or to a park or something like that as she hasn't had a lot of 1 on 1 time with me lately. Not that I haven't tried, like on the weekend when Caitlyn was asleep we all put the tree up together and during nap times, just Bethany and I have been decorating it. We have nearly finished, but geez, a week to get the tree up is a long time. And I think the lack of me and her time is finally starting to get to her. It's just little things she has been saying and doing. I mean she loves Caitlyn with all her heart, just tonight she came over to her while I was feeding her and said "I love you Caitlyn, I'll always be here for you, I give you my heart." My mouth just dropped. I asked her where she had heard that and she said, "Nowhere, I just said it." But then earlier this afternoon when we all had to nick to the supermarket to get some bits and pieces she said "I want to stay here with daddy" and I told her we where all going and she said "I sure hope Caitlyn isn't coming". I asked her why she said that and she said she didn't know, which is what makes me think I need to be having more time with her.

I can only try.

I am feeling better within myself now, not as strung out as last week. Caitlyn seems to have settled into 3 hourly feeds but now that Pete is back at work, I am trying to do as much of the night feeds by myself as possible as he gets up at 5am every morning as it is. At the moment she is only waking twice once we go to bed so it isn't disrupting him too much and I am getting between 6-7.5 hours sleep a night, depending on her tummy. Sometimes at the 4/5am feed, she gets a bit of tummy pain which I have to help her with, and that keeps me up about 30min-1hour longer.

I still also have to post my birth story. I started it the weekend after Caitlyn was born but then went into hospital on the Tuesday and then with Christmas shopping, it seems to have got pushed to the background, so will finish it shortly.

Well, had better sign off now, she is due for a feed in 2 hours so best I head to bed and get some much needed sleep.

Tootles.

Posted by Kim :: 10:04 PM :: 2 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Friday, December 08, 2006

Busy week

Well, so much for starting this week off better.

Monday morning I woke up with the flu, sore throat, stuffy head, migraine and runny nose. By Tuesday it had gone to my chest and thankfully I was still on my antibiotics so it seemed to lessen the severity of it.

Unfortunately, I am starting to think Caitlyn has it now. She has this little cough, but only when laying down so it's difficult to tell, and is also sneezing. Not much I can do there.

Last night we ventured to a major shopping centre to pick up my Christmas laybys, bad idea. It was a big task, we knew, but it wasn't made any easier when I went back to the car to put them away so Bethany didn't see them and locked the keys in the boot! I went back to mum and Pete crying my eyes out as Caitlyn had had her last bottle and I didn't know what we were going to do. So we rang and joined the RAC ($174 later) and after and hour and a half a guy came out and broke into the car for us. So we came home nearly 2 hours late with a very tired 4 year old, a very grumpy baby and I was totally exhausted, sick and miserable for costing us so much money for something so stupid. I dropped off Pete and the kids and took my mum home and then cried all the way back home. Let's just blame hormones, OK.

I think the only good thing to come out of last night was that I got the girls Santa photos taken. Here, have a peek.



And today we went and had their portraits done, which I am dying to see. We had one of both the girls in Christmas dress up, on of them as fairies and one of Caitlyn on her own as an angel and also surrounded in flowers. She slept through the lot and only started crying when I dressed her again and put her in the pram. But she went back to sleep almost immediately and is still asleep. In fact she is almost 40mins past her usual feeding time (she is feeding 3 hourly at the moment).

So I may sign off now and have a nice hot shower before she wakes. But knowing my luck, I'll turn the taps on and she'll wake up.

Hope everyone is well. Be back soon.

Posted by Kim :: 2:14 PM :: 4 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Sunday, December 03, 2006

Trying to get back to normal

Well I am trying to get things to settle down and back to normal now that everyone is home and hopefully well, it hasn't been the 2 weeks I had intended on having after giving birth, that's for sure!

I am almost back to normal since coming out of hospital on Thursday. Geez Tuesday was scarey. I had been complaining to my mum about my afterpains all day but on a visit to the shopping centre they just seemed to get worse and worse until they were so bad I couldn't stand up straight. We took mum home and by the time we got home I had a fever of 38.8. Shivered under a blanket until I threw up and developed a terrible migraine headache. It was after this we decided to go to the after hours GP at the hospital so Pete ran around and got Bethany's dinner and then rushed to pick up my mum to look after the girls. We got to the clinic and for the first time I can recall, there were no patients. I was taken in my the nurse and assessed, had my temp taken (now 39.9 degrees) and she said she was taking me straight through to the doctor. She took me in and told him "I think she has infected retained products". He went through the exact same questions the nurse did (he was pretty hopeless), rang the obstetric ward to find out how to have me admitted and then I was sent to the ER in a wheelchair. Once I was there I went through all the same questions again and was asked to wait but was told it wouldn't be long. About 5 mins later a nurse called me, took me straight in and within 10 mins I had an IV in my arm and all sorts of drugs pumped into me, including stuff to stop nausea, morphine, and I was told about 4 different kinds of antibiotics, which is why I made the decision then and there to take Caitlyn permanently off my breastmilk. And all I could do was cry. Was I making the right decision. I didn't want to be in hospital. I didn't want to be admitted. I didn't want to lug Pete with the burden of being thrown into looking after both girls on his own just 5 days after coming home, considering he hadn't made a bottle or changed a nappy yet. I just wanted to go home and hold my girls. I was in terrible pain but I was crying because I just wanted it all to stop and to go home.

And thats how it happened. I was eventually taken back to the maternity ward at about 2am (Pete had had to leave at 10.30 to get back and feed Caitlyn) where I went in and out of unconciousness until about 6am where I threw up again and was told I would be having surgery later that morning. I was told at 8am that it would be about 10.30 but they came and got me at 9.30 and was back in my room by 10.30. Pete, mum and the girls were waiting for me when I came back. I was told that they would probably keep me in until Friday, but that night I was told if my fever came down I would be able to go home Thursday, which is what happened.

So, there you have it. I am still on 2 different kinds of antibiotics for another week and hopefully everything is OK.

While flashing back over the last week, Bethany's concert was great. Was disappointed after her first dance as the helpers in the changeroom did not do her costume up properly and 3/4 of the way through the dance, it came undone and started to fall off. My poor little girl grabbed hold of it and tried to dance and keep it up at the same time until she was called off stage, had it done back up, ran back on and took her place and continued. I was so proud. She said to me afterwards "did you see me hold my top up, I was scared everyone would see my boobies!" Luckily her second routine was problem free.



Then Sunday we kept a promise we had made to Bethany the week before when Pete and I went and got our hair cut. It was the Friday before Caitlyn was born and she had wanted hers cut too but we told her she would have to wait until the day after the concert as she needed to wear her wig and if she got it cut it wouldn't be long enough. So we took her and I asked the hairdresser to cut it shoulder length. She made the first cut and I almost fainted. She had cut it just above her shoulders. She looked at me and must have seen the look on my face. She said "this is the length you wanted" WELL it was kind of too late to ask that question so I just politely smiled and nodded. Bethany seemed really happy with it, she hasn't had it this short since she was 18 months old (I went through all our photos to see).



I look at her now and she seems so grown up. And the last 2 weeks seems to have made her grow a little too. She does some things on her own, without even being asked, but sometimes she seems so little too, if that makes sense, and I worry that I am not giving her enough attention and if she resents having Caitlyn around. Geez, I'm crying again. I really like putting myself through hell.

And of course, with the new haircut, a new photo of the 2 girls was required.



So hopefully now things will settle down. I know with a newborn that's hard to say, but at least settle down to the way things are supposed to be with a newborn.

So expect to hear more from me again now, hopefully (Hopefully is my pet word at the moment). I have been keeping up with all your blogs, all be it a quiet reader at the moment but will be looking to get back in action.

Oh and PS I weighed myself today, 2 weeks after giving birth, I am 91.4kg.

Posted by Kim :: 6:45 PM :: 4 Comments:

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--------------------------------------- Thursday, November 30, 2006

Really being tested

I tell you I am really being tested at being a parent this time around.

Not only was I having feeding problems, Sunday Caitlyn woke with conjunctivitis. Got her to the doctor on Monday, got drops for her and that finally started to clear Tuesday morning. Tuesday night, however, I was rushed to hospital with servere stomach pains and fever. Quick examination showed I had retained products from birth that had got infected. Was admited and yesterday had a D&C to clean me out and have just now been discharged from hospital.

Pete was great. He took care of both girls the whole time I was in hospital and as Caitlyn was already on formula we just continued as I didn't want any of the drugs I was on to effect her and I just didn't have the energy to sit up, let alone express any milk. So now she is no longer having breast milk.

I tell you it hasn't been the best first 2 weeks of being a new mum.

This is just going to be a quick entry for today, just to let you all know what was going on with me. Lets hope things can only get better from here. Right?!?!?!?!

Posted by Kim :: 4:58 PM :: 2 Comments:

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